why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
