Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
