we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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