i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
