so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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