i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
