Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
