I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Pooping to opera.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
