So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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