awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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