Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
