I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
