she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
