Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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