you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
