Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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