I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize