ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
