I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
