Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I need water and some morals
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
