I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
