I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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