To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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