You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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