Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
