It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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