did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
