dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize