What a fucking waste of an outfit
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
