you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
