Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
