butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
