If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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