Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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