lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
