I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
