i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
