New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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