Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
