Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize