Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I need water and some morals
Randomize
