Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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