Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
