This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
