i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Someone came in the potted fern
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
