This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
