im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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