You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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