I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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