Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
